TGIF // 07

Heyyyy everyone. It’s been a while since I’ve checked in here, didn’t mean to disappear. I have to say….pregnancy fatigue is real. I’m only about a week away from entering my 3rd trimester so the aches and pains are starting to creep in. The next three months will be interesting, haha. I’m trying to cut myself some slack and be kind to myself as my body morphs into something I don’t recognize from the neck down, but being kind to myself is really hard to do. It’s hard to not feel down or bad when I’m not as productive as I once was…or when a hike tires me out so much I feel like crying by the end of it (or maybe, if you’re pregnant too, you do cry a little because you’re hormonal and exhausted and too hot? that definitely didn’t happen to me, just hypothetical…). I’m trying to stay positive and be excited and not overly terrified about the future, but sometimes that takes more mental energy than I’d like to admit.

Anyway, I’m very grateful for this whole experience. Really. Feeling the little kicks and jabs has been pretty magical and sweet. Despite the fear…I’m really excited about, and seriously attached to, this little human already. And I’m so grateful that so far everything has been “normal” and the baby is healthy…but it’d be a lie to say it’s been a picnic. Mentally and physically it’s been tough at times. I mean, how do you mentally prepare for bringing a new human into the world? If you know, let me in on your secrets plz and thx.

Free Pattern by the lovely Juliet Meeks

This week I’m trusting that I’m right where I’m supposed to be. I’m trusting that all those emotions and thoughts I just expressed are completely normal (and I’m told they are). I’m trusting that I’ll figure things out as I go, just like everyone seems to. And I’m trusting that it’s going to be life changing and beautiful and difficult as most good things are.

Lately, I’ve been feeling grateful for daily walks, rest, and prayer. These things have kept me sane. It’s amazing what a quick walk does to clear my mind of negativity and reorient my focus on the goodness in front of me. It’s also amazing what a quick nap does for my mood (does 2 hours count as quick? no?). And of course prayer…I don’t know how people center themselves without it. I’ve found a lot of peace and comfort in saying prayers all throughout the day, and I like to try to remember to say thanks as often as I ask for help. Gratitude is so so important to how my day goes….which ties into a new art project I’m starting soon, but more on that later.

This week I’m finding a ton of interior/home design inspiration online. I hadn’t really thought about how into design/decorating I’ve gotten over the last few years – but most of my favorite blogs and TV shows are design related.

Here are some of my favorite posts from the week:
This room refresh. Love how light and airy it feels, and that she kept all her current furniture – and stayed on a budget.
This Shibori tutorial. I love the colors she mixed, I’m really wanting to give this a try.
This simple candle DIY. I used to make candles all the time in high school with my sisters. It was so fun to experiment with. Seeing these pretty jars, and being reminded of how easy it is, makes me want to pick up the hobby again. Not to mention all the pretty/quality candles these days are like $20 each. No thanks.

And last but not least, my faith update. My faith and my relationship with God are things I’m always working on. My spirituality is a constant learning and growing process – I guess like any good relationship usually is and should be. It shouldn’t be stagnant, and you never really reach a point where you have it all figured out…it’s often 2 steps forward, 1 step back…or 5 steps back. And that’s ok. I’d like to devote more time to prayer, reflection, and being quiet/still. Some days I feel disconnected and wonder why, but then I realize I haven’t even given 5 minutes thought to my spiritual life…and yet I’ve spent countless hours online or looking at my phone or complaining to Brent about something or worrying about something I can’t control, etc. etc. So anyway – those are just some rambly thoughts about my faith this week. I’m so thankful to have a spiritual life again, and I can’t believe I neglected it for so long. I’m enjoying and looking forward to the continued journey – and getting closer to God through each step. (Insert footprints poem, lolz).

I hope you all have a beautiful weekend. Thanks for being here. Xo.



TGIF // 03

Happy 2017! Hard to believe that in a few years we’ll be hitting the 2020 mark…I feel old every time i think about that, so let’s not. Last year I started a series called TGIF and only wrote 2 posts before disappearing. Whoops. It’s hard to stay focused, and it’s harder to find motivation after working 40 hours a week at my job. But after listening to this podcast episode – I’ve decided to change my mindset. My real life, the one I cherish and am proud of, is the life in which I’m a writer and an artist. My side life is the life in which I work 40 hours for a corporation I don’t really care about. So instead of thinking of my hobbies and passions as the secondary or even tertiary parts of my life, I’m ready to put them front and center. It will take some work and time, but it’s an important mental shift that I’ll be working on.

So on to the TGIF portion…

This week I’m trusting that all of the unknowns in my life will work out just as they should. I’m trusting that I already have everything I need, and I’m trying to not focus on lack – but on abundance. Because I have so so much, and am very lucky – regardless of what my ego tells me sometimes (you need more money, that person is more talented, look how much they’re doing with their life!, etc. etc.).

This week I’m feeling grateful for family and friends. The holidays can be intense, and I always really miss my immediate family this time of year because I never can make it home to see everyone over Christmas. But how lucky am I to have people to miss; people I want to be spending time with and people who love me and make that known regularly (and for technology that makes it possible). I’m also extremely grateful for my in-laws. My husband’s sisters are some of my best friends – and his parents remind me so much of my own.

Lately, I’ve been finding so much inspiration in textiles. I love the deep indigos of shibori dyeing, I love the simple but beautiful designs of mud cloth, and I love the intricate mix of color and pattern in many traditional weavings. I’d love to incorporate some of these things into my art – my wheels are turning.

Vintage Medium Indigo Tie Dye, African Mud Cloth Pillow, Shibori Tie Dye,  Cotton Linen Pillow, 20 inch, Rose Gold Zipper, Bohemian Decor
you can find this beautiful pillow here.

read more about the history of mud cloth here.

Moroccan rug

This brings back some memories - a Navajo woman taught a class of us in high school how to weave blankets because
Traditional Navajo weaving

Lastly, my update on faith. I recently heard an Anne Lamott quote that really struck me, so I’ll leave you all with this.

“I have a lot of faith. But I am also afraid a lot, and have no real certainty about anything. I remembered something Father Tom had told me–that the opposite of faith is not doubt, but certainty. Certainty is missing the point entirely. Faith includes noticing the mess, the emptiness and discomfort, and letting it be there until some light returns.”

The opposite of faith is not doubt, but certainty. Whoa. If only someone would have told me that at age 15…although sometimes the truth isn’t truth until you’re ready to hear it.

I hope you all have a beautiful weekend!


P.S.If you’re curious about the origins of my TGIF posts you can see post 1 and 2 here.


i’ve been thinking a lot about authenticity. is it possible to be authentic in a world where we share everything we’re doing on social media? we post glimpses of our lives, or what we want others to believe our lives are like, but why? in the hopes of getting “likes” and affirmation from friends or strangers? or because we genuinely have something we want to share with the world? another picture of our face? another picture of our dinner? sometimes i feel like the only way to be authentic would be to delete all social media and allow my world to be private. to be driven by what i really want, and not what i want to show off.

i’m currently reading this book, lovingly, georgia. it’s a compilation of letters between georgia o’keeffe and anita pollitzer from 1915-1968. i’m about halfway through, and the letters i’m reading currently were sent in 1915 and 1916 during the height of georgia and anita’s friendship. georgia was not famous yet, nor had she received any real recognition for her work. she is an aspiring young artist who has a desire to express her inner-most feelings – and makes bold claims about not caring what anyone else thinks. but every so often that tough exterior cracks, and she admits that she is overjoyed when someone likes her work. she waffles between caring and not caring – always insisting that her work is personal, and for her, but admitting that she gets excited about others’ reactions. so, is there a difference between her struggle and mine?


not really, but the answer of what to share and when is becoming clear to me. the bottom line is…do i have something worth sharing? is it meaningful to me? if i’m attached to my art, and it says something important to me or about me, or about the human condition..then it makes sense to want to share it. if i just want to post another picture of this cool thing i’m doing over the weekend because i like seeing how many likes i can get, and it puffs up my ego…is that really healthy? a question to ask is, am i sharing this because i want to be perceived a certain way, or because i really want other people to see and experience this? i think a majority of us share for the sake of sharing…instead of sharing because we really have something to offer. one seems insanely selfish, and the other not…and yet they can look interchangeable.

this isn’t to say i’m judging anyone – this is really an internal rant/struggle that i’m trying to work through. do i think everyone posting selfies on instagram is selfish? no, although the term “selfie” would imply some things…but i do think the age of instant everything has made us all a bit more shallow. posting art online to send the message “hey, i’m an artist!” rather than whatever it is the art is actually supposed to say seems so sad and convoluted. we’ve lost the art of art, in those instances.

Summer Days Painting by Georgia O'keeffe; Summer Days Art Print for sale

in lovingly, georgia anita pollitzer repeatedly refers to georgia’s paintings and drawings as “feelings”. i showed your feelings to so and so, i’m keeping your feelings safe, etc. etc. – and isn’t this what art should be?

here’s a little excerpt from a letter that anita wrote to georgia shortly after receiving some of georgia’s latest work.

“astounded and awfully happy were my feelings today when i opened the batch of drawings. i tell you i felt them! & when i say that i mean that. they’ve gotten past the personal stage into the big sort of emotions that are common to big people – but it’s your version of it. i mean if they’d been stuck on a wall & i’d been told XZ did them I’d have liked them as much as if i’d been told picasso did them, or someone i’d never heard of. pat (she calls georgia pat) -well they’ve gotten there as far as i’m concerned & you ought to cry because you’re so happy. you’ve said something!

now, i’m not saying i’ll never post a picture of my daily experiences on social media – i do think family and friends across the country enjoy seeing those things. i know i like to see pictures of people i know and love living their lives. i’m also not saying that i’ll always feel deeply about what i create. but maybe we should think more about our motivations – and if we really need to share as much as we do. do you have something worth sharing? and if not, why? it’s easy to be shallow, it’s easy to post a picture of your latest dinner, or that coffee drink you ordered – you have to dig a little deeper to create something you care about, and actually care about sharing.

let’s all try to say something. instead of anything.

images: “red poppy” and “summer days” by georgia o’keeffe